Skip to content
עברית Read this post in
The practice of nonviolence
“Nonviolence is the summit of bravery.” Mahatma Gandhi
Nonviolence is defined as the refraining from force to achieve one’s goals.
But how do we do that in a violent world?
No matter how far we’ve come as a civilization, we’re still faced with acts of violence in and outside our home.
It appears that there will always be people who push others and people to push around.
Regardless of who we are and what we believe in, we’re often confronted against our will with acts of aggression.
Whether these are innocuous or offensive, they hold within the potential to harm us.
For that alone they should be avoided.
Allowing others to rid themselves of their negativity on our account, tolerating the toxic waste, definitely isn’t the way to go.
The same can be said of the inner-violence we harbor as our venting and beating ourselves down can turn self-destructive.
So how do we deal with violence¿
For the well-being of others and our own, we start by understanding the root cause of our violent habits and behaviors.
Protect yourself
“Violence, even well intentioned, always rebounds upon oneself.” Lao Tzu
When we embark on the path of mind training, it’s by choice, one that directs us to steer away from violence.
Understanding that mental habits and actions involving hatred, anger, and resentment lead to more of the same motivates our efforts.
Instead of reacting to repair the injustice, we learn to observe how it affects us, we watch as it unfolds mentally.
Even in the face of outrage, insult and undeserved blame, we yield.
We make sure there’s ground, we consider the fallout.
Thus we shield ourselves from unnecessary injury.
We opt for the smart approach to meaningless miseries rather than react blindly.
Measuring our response to violence is not an easy task, it takes courage and a clear mind.
That needs cultivating…
Knowing our natural inclinations and the propensity of the mind towards negativity, we pay no heed to its calling.
Whether or not justice is done, we stand firm.
We fight the itch to follow our thoughts and emotions, by training our mind to systematically choose nonviolence.
Curb your impulse
“Restraint from violence towards others is ultimately a way of protecting ourselves, for whatever harms others indirectly harms us too.” Geshe Sonam Rinchen, Ruth Sonam
Showing restraint while in the sway of our angry thoughts demands some effort on our part.
So we arm ourselves with plenty of patience and compassion.
Only when we’ve mastered the art of curbing our impulses, do we stand a chance against the flow of constant recaps.
No matter the circumstances, we remind ourselves that engaging in aggression ultimately retaliates on itself.
That is, violence can only be cause to more violence.
Therefore we disengage by not identifying with the situation, bringing to mind that it’s not personal.
Whatever the form it takes, it’s really not about us at all.
People act and behave the way they do because of their own natural inclinations, tendencies, and culture.
Others serve as outlets, by-standing recipients…
Once we’ve internalized that very fact, we’re set to skillfully remove ourselves from the situation in a graceful way.
Our coming to know our sensitivities as well as our limitations, we learn to slow down before we respond, we breathe.
As meditation practitioners we cultivate zero tolerance for homemade suffering, so we keep mindful of our state of mind.
Mind your mindset
“All too often we perpetuate our pain, keep it alive, by replaying our hurts over and over again in our minds, magnifying our injustices in the process.” Dalai Lama
It is said that everything rests on motivation, thus our being aware of our present mindset is key.
Therefore we must keep on practicing mindfulness daily, so we don’t lose to our mind’s predisposition for forgetfulness.
Mindfulness implies staying sharp, it’s the skillful mean that allows us to pick-up the signals that read and call for violence.
But it isn’t enough, we have to acknowledge the emotions that befall us, and apply the right antidote to our predicament.
In order to adopt the right approach, we begin by asking the question that will help us out of the woods.
Since violence only generates violence, before we take a step further, we give ourselves a chance to revise course.
We learn to move wisely…
We ask ourselves, no matter where we are and what is moving through, Are you sure you want to go there?
Doing so directs towards right thinking and sheds light on our own state of nervousness.
We bring to awareness our own inner dialog.
Watch your words
“Right Speech is based on Right Thinking. Speech is the way for our thinking to express itself aloud.” Thich Nhat Hanh
Violence holds its own dictionary, the words it contains may differ from one to another, but its message stays the same.
It finds its voice in fear, guilt and blame so we start listening, we spot the words that carry their weight.
We apply ourselves at coming to know better our own vocabulary, we tune-in the inner chatter bent on aggression.
Knowing how it sounds like, what it is composed of and how it draws-us-in is enlightening.
Basically, we come to grasp with what is to be nurtured and what is to be relinquished.
Thus, our listening-in leaves room for ‘proofreading’.
We clean up…
As we advance in practice, we’re better at slowing the stream of words that come out of our mouth.
We take a moment to reconsider our every word.
At the same time, we are careful as to the words we use towards ourselves.
We stay verbally nonviolent inside and outside ourselves.
That does not mean we stop standing ground, cave-in or retreat when it comes to our basic rights.
On the contrary, we keep the right to voice inequalities and unfairness, we just become much better at it.
Nonviolence is everything but wishy washy
“There are two sources of strength in our world. One is the force of hatred, of those who are unafraid to kill. The other and greater strength comes from those who are unafraid to die.” Jack Kornfield
The Buddhist path is one of compassion towards oneself and towards others, it recognizes suffering as ever present.
It does not deny the suffering of the world but gives it its rightful place, it understands our trouble.
Pointing at the mind as the source of our problems, it helps us see that in essence we’re wired the same.
We have our triggers and our habits, deeply concealed beneath our sense of justice, and they’re in charge.
That is until we train…
When we come to accept that this is it, we’re left with the choice to act compassionately even if only for ourselves.
So, we work at growing the seeds that allow us to do better and we constantly remind ourselves that we can.
In the end, compassion gives us strength in the face of open aggression.
Instead of assigning blame and retaliating, we the take command over.
We stop acting out of fear, guilt and blame, we take responsibility for ourselves and others.
We show character rather than strength
Life leaves us with endless opportunities to pacify our mind.
Difficult encounters can be seen as a chance to become softer and wiser.
A stage on which we can serve as role models to others.
Be smart, choose nonviolence, keep the peace, let karma take care of the restॐ
Nathalie Bizawi, founder of Wisdom & Mindfulness meditation center. Senior Meditation, Mindfulness and philosophy instructor, From Wingate Academic College. M.A in Education from TAU University, Tel Aviv.
Wisdom & Mindfulness your meditation center in Tel Aviv