Wisdom & Mindfulness

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Worrying ~ a distressing phenomenon

“Worrying does not help at all. In fact it makes things worse.” Chogyam Trungpa, Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche

Worrying is characterized by the presence of anxiety and unhappiness caused by real problems and thoughts of anticipated difficulty.

On days when worries taunts us, we should take a moment to understand what we’re dealing with and at what costs.

We’re fret in concerns for our relatives, securing livelihood, achieving goals, protecting our property; living in a state of permanent worry.

On top of our common troubles, we’re prone to more worry when things seem to be out of control or uncertain.

We may claim that worrying for good reasons is legitimate, but its nature is the same as worrying out of delusion.

What does worry consist of? How does it manifest? If we want to ward it off, we’ll need some background.

Everything is but mind

“The key is how we respond to worry, how we relate to it.” David A. Carbonell, Sally M. Winston

To make things clear, we need to understand how our mind, the main computer, translates internal and external stimuli into actual reality.

In short, our mind receives information from the sensory system, which directs it through a sorting station responsible for identifying and managing danger.

Safety first

Our mind tends to systematically seek out negative cues in every situation, if it recognizes danger it triggers emergency mechanisms.

At this point, the field of vision narrows, there’s no logical analysis of things, no re-examination, negative feelings arise and subsequently emotions follow.

We’re unaware of the chain reaction, uninvolved in the process, soon thoughts rush-in to convince us our feelings and emotions are justified.

What’s more, a low sensitivity threshold for discomfort turns our mind into a fertile ground for negative emotions.

Hence, worry thoughts that are not immediately addressed will easily multiply and take root in our mind.

Worry ~ have we ever met?

“When the mind goes over and over a problem and is ceaselessly concerned with it, that is what we call worry, is it not?” Jiddu Krishnamurti

Worrying is a fear-based state of mind, characterized by a plethora of negative thoughts vis-à-vis what’s to come for ourselves or our loved-ones.

In this state, what is stamped ‘undesirable’ by our mind grows out of proportion, we move away from reality, our discomfort increases respectively.

We tend to believe the signs first, we don’t stop to check if those are founded.

Convinced that our judgment is based, we blindly allow our thoughts to lead, that’s one of the tricks of the mind.

We’re distressed, although we know for a fact worrying cannot possibly predict the future, we accept everything as absolute truth.

Turning into involuntary partners, we feed ourselves scenarios that hold no reasonable basis as to what’s to come, we fall into fear.

The more we struggle against or try to repress worry we exacerbate it, if we allow it tension will intensify.

As the level of unease rises, we’re left we a feeling of growing anxiety.

The inside and outside cost of worrying

“If we allow worry to fill our hearts, sooner or later we will get sick.” Thich Nhat Hanh

A degree of concern is natural but when it turns chronic it takes its toll.

Not only does worrying impacts the quality of our life, it affects the health of our relationships.

So what does influence worry?

Like any emotion, what fosters or lessens worry habits is the emphasis we put on things; our belief in worry thoughts.

When worry pervades our mind there’s very little space for anything else, we’re caught in a loop.

Mentally circling around a problem over and over, causes restlessness, thus shortening the distance from anxiety.

Ongoing concern exposes us to a variety of chronic illnesses, the stress that accompanies it weakens our immune system, all of which isn’t healthy.

Beside the physical toll, worrying seems to be contagious, it doesn’t stop at creating havoc in our mind; it burdens the general atmosphere.

So what should we do? First, we should learn to manage the phenomenon and in order to do so, we have to train our mind.

We have to work at recognizing the signs, activate the tools at our disposal on time, and remember to breathe.

Mindfulness and meditation ~ quit worrying

“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”. Erma Bombeck

Meditation practice allows input to move through alternative pathways, turning the controls over a less sensitive place, one that supports rational thinking.

Mindfulness meditation practice adds a measure of mental clarity, allowing us to bring maximum attention to both our inner and external environment.

Because worrying is a mental habit, an automatic response to problems, we need to identify its signals, note how they manifest within.

Using mind training, we slowly learn to listen, see in depth and identify harmful habits, and finally shift our mental state.

Humans are creatures of habit, for some worry is constant; they live under continuous pressure and stress, persuaded it’s their job.

Endless worrying can have devastating effects, so we must acknowledge that it’s an unhealthy mental habit that has no real value.

Lastly, we have to recognize the suffering that worry can cause us.

Develop emotional resilience

“If there is no solution to the problem then don’t waste time worrying about it. If there is a solution to the problem then don’t waste time worrying about it.” The Dalai Lama

The more we worry the more distressed we feel, that can easily spin out of control, lead to anxiety and panic.

In that state we’re trapped in a pool of worry, our body becomes the innocent victim of our own nervousness.

Countless research shows the negative effect and chronic diseases worry leads to; that’s something we can control if we wish.

To stop patterns of self-destruction, we need to develop some mental resilience when it comes to our thoughts, feelings and emotions.

Contemplation meditations helps us slowly but surely befriend our mental noise and its physical expressions.

We get to see how our mind resorts to guilt, criticism and judgment, and how these take our freedom away.

With great faith and courage we try to change our relationship with the unpleasantness, to tolerate, not to fight or resist.

When our mind is in a frantic state it tends to focus its attention towards the self; everything revolves around that.

The more the emphasis is placed on the “I”, the more worry thoughts, so it’s worth keeping some emotional distance.

Returning to reality

“If you’re going to worry make sure you worry about something worthwhile.” Lama Yeshe

The goal is to change our habits, we don’t settle with discomfort, we strive to free ourselves from the suffering worry fosters.

To do this, we have to side with the truth; endeavor to establish whether or not our pessimistic scenarios are founded.

So first, we’ll put a question mark on what we know and cultivate reservations has to our understanding of the situation.

We’ll need to keep some emotional ‘distance’ to see beyond the screen of our own making; to stay neutral and avoid over-identifying

To uncover the truth we need to shed light on our fears; time to turn to analytical meditations and find what they contain.

Instead of wasting time and energy brooding, we’ll use our concerns and invite them to our meditation.

We turn things around… 

If we want to overcome worry, we need to see things in perspective, before we can bring it to proportion.

When worry comes up stop, breathe slowly, acknowledge the emotions, explore in meditation, ensure their basis is trueॐ

Nathalie Bizawi, founder of Wisdom & Mindfulness meditation center. Senior Meditation, Mindfulness and philosophy instructor, From Wingate Academic College. M.A in Education from TAU University, Tel Aviv.

Wisdom & Mindfulness meditation center in Tel Aviv.