Wisdom & Mindfulness

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Ethical discipline in everyday life

“The mind that guards against unwholesome behavior is called ethical discipline.” Gen Lamrimpa, Pauly B. Fitze, Dalai Lama, B. Alan Wallace

Ethical discipline, morality, is one of the three higher trainings of the mind in the Buddhist tradition.  

It implies steering clear of wrong doing as well as the willingness to lay a hand when we can.

Staying mindful of our ethics under every circumstance may be hard but it’s to our benefit, it serves as a shield.

Making sure our actions are directed towards the greater good protects us from unnecessary grief.

For yourself and others

Everything we think, say and do carries immediate and unforeseen repercussions, not only on ourselves but on others too.

Understanding cause and effect, we are wise to ensure that we are taking the right course of action.

Thinking in terms of ethical discipline helps make the right choices and thus safeguards us from harm.

Our commitment to the best outcome possible makes ethical conduct the perfect guide in our lives.

Morality

“The usual definition of morality is not harming others through actions of body, speech, or mind.” Lama Zopa

We might not be aware of it all the time, but we all have living principles in mind, inner guides.

These may be the fruits of our upbringing and education, our cultural background, religious beliefs, and lifetime experiences.

Whether or not we live by our moral rules depends on our being confident these are here to do us good.

Sure, the big No No’s we rarely cross, but once in a while an opportunity presents itself, and it’s alluring…

Make it intentional

The problem is that our personal needs always come first, the urge to get makes hard resisting temptations.

For us not to fall, we have to intentionally monitor what goes on in our mind, think about what we’re doing.

Instead of fixing our eyes on the prize, we ought to look at what it entails and whether or not it’s worth it.

Sadly, we rarely analyze things in terms of costs, nor do we consider the corollary damage to others, although we should.  

Ethical discipline is kindness towards oneself and others

“The call to ethical discipline challenges each of us to examine our own behavior carefully, noting both short-term and long-term consequences of our actions.” B. Alan Wallace Ph.D., Daniel Goleman

None of us wants to suffer, we do because we are not paying attention, we forget that what we do counts.

We may know right from wrong but under the strain of certain circumstances, we’ll put our principles aside.

We bend the rules just a bit to suit our urges, nothing big, but these transgressions have a price tag.

As a result, we’re surprised when things turn sour and we are paying the bill, no point saying I told you so…

Wear an armor at all time

 We’ll do just about anything for the things we desire, even if these may call for unscrupulous deeds.  

Also, we rarely think about the consequences, and when we do, we’ll rationalizing our wrong doings.

Without guidelines we are at the mercy of our wants, not being careful can have detrimental effects.

That’s why we practice morality, so that our motivations stay in line with what we want, that is lasting happiness.

Why cultivate your ethics?

“How we want our life to be – full of problems or full of happiness – is completely in our hands.” Lama Yeshe

We’re not in the Wild Wild West, where everything is permitted and nothing forbidden, there are rules.

We intuitively know that thinking “anything for the gold” isn’t wise, we don’t go about lying, stealing or killing.  

Besides the idea of committing a ‘crime’ of some sort makes you sick to your stomach, so why worry about ethics?

Because without it we would have hard time navigating the grey areas, managing the little things that ask for bad acts.  

Ethical discipline comes rain or snow

When we lack moral restraint what governs our decision making are our desires and our hates, that’s a recipe for disaster.

Our craving and anger make us forget what we’ve been taught, when push comes to shove, we slip up.

We’re left with the anxiety and the stress it creates and the ripples it leaves behind, that’s not smart nor healthy.     

Sticking with ethical discipline makes taking the right course of action clear cut, no matter what we’re faced with, we know…

Do away with unnecessary worry

“Practising sila [morality] is for the quietude of one’s own body.” Tony Page, Kosho Yamamoto

We all carry around a childhood memory of ourselves taking something without permission, remember how it felt?

The exhilaration, the fear of getting caught, the shame and regret knowing that we were doing wrong.

The stress and anxiety we felt then, we feel every time we do something we know we shouldn’t.    

It creates physical and emotional tensions that take away our joy and our serenity, there goes your happiness.

Learn your lesson

The way to shelter ourselves from unnecessary worry is to follow what we know is sure to do good.

We have enough reasons for stress and anxiety in modern society, there’s no point adding on what’s already piling-up.

Instead, we should cultivate an attitude that truly considers the best possible outcome, to safeguard our peace of mind.

Ethical discipline should be on our mind always, everywhere we go we ought to try to abide by it, no exceptions.   

Ethical discipline in times of adversity

“Paying attention to the ethical implications of our choices has never been more pressing—or more complicated—than it is today.” Sharon Salzberg

We may wish to be surrounded by good but that’s fantasy, in truth people deliberately or not will hurt us.

Our ethics are put to the test in those very moments where the very foundations of our morality are shaken.

Our reaction to our being lied to, robbed, hurt depends on how strong those foundations are, hence the need for practice.

Handling our anger and pain, resisting the urge to retaliate demands both strong determination and right understanding.   

Because what goes around comes around

You may have been taught “an eye for and eye”, to always even the score, question is at what cost?

If you are intent on revenge to save your name and reputation, you’re satisfying your ego’s need for justice.

Fulfilling its wishes is bound to have you suffer, to make you victim and perpetrator at your expense.

Remember we’re in the pursuit happiness, to achieve it we must realize that getting even doesn’t help.

How meditation fits in

“The mind that understands its own nature automatically becomes moral, or positive; and the actions motivated by such a mind also become positive. That’s what we call morality.” Lama Thubten Yeshe, Nicholas Ribush

To fully embrace moral values, we should be convinced of their value, we ought to know it’s worth it.  

We must go beyond what we take as a given, past our mere obedience to the rules, investigate for ourselves.

Think about the effects of our actions and evaluate which brings about happiness and which suffering.

What we need is a neutral space for our exploration, it’s essential if we want to distance ourselves from the situation.

Insight meditation is the perfect means, it allows us to assess and weigh pros and cons from every angle.

Go even further

Resting on our mindfulness, we’re better suited to take a step back before we act, but that’s just a start.

By inviting our ethical dilemmas to our meditation practice, we make possible finding our way out.

The more we practice, the stronger our conviction gets, the easier it is to refrain from unwholesome deeds.

Nobody’s perfect we may do wrong from time to time, but that doesn’t mean we won’t do better next time.  

Every so often we struggle doing the right thing, stop and consider this, would you’d like it be done to you? If not, don’t. 

Nathalie Bizawi, founder of Wisdom & Mindfulness meditation center. Senior Meditation, Mindfulness and philosophy instructor, From Wingate Academic College. M.A in Education from TAU University, Tel Aviv.

 

Wisdom & Mindfulness your meditation center in Tel Aviv